A few days ago, a coworker and I had a difference of opinion about a strategy for an upcoming product. Ultimately, I saw the merit in the approach he was proposing, and I decided to proceed with that strategy. I also sent him a note afterwards assuring him that I want that type of pushback, regardless of the outcome.
In your organization, when you express your perspective, do you believe that it matters? When you speak up as a Kickstarter backer, when do you feel like you’ve had an impact? And conversely, when you ask for feedback, are you actually open to hearing and acting on a dissenting opinion?
I’ve been on both sides of this. I’ve definitely failed as a leader many times when I receive unsolicited advice, and there have been times when someone has asked for my advice and I didn’t get the impression that anything I said would actually make an impact.
Here are a few quick observations and notes about this topic:
- I started thinking about this recently after I got an email from Adam H. about an internal company survey he had recently taken. He highlighted a question near at the end of the survey that read, “Do you believe that change will occur based on the responses to this survey?” I thought this was both an interesting way for an organization to gauge whether people feel heard and a great question to show someone that you truly are going to consider their feedback.
- After sharing my love of time-loop fiction on Twitter, someone recommended that I watch episode 18 of season 5 of Star Trek: The Next Generation. In the episode, there’s a scene in which Captain Jean-Luc Picard has a meeting with his top crewmembers. Typically this is the kind of scene in a TV show where “leadership” is conveyed by having the captain raise their voice, point at people, and demand action. But Picard goes around the table and asks for each person to share their perspectives. He listens carefully before responding with the next step. It’s brilliant leadership.
- Recently on a game design Facebook group, someone shared a link to their live Kickstarter project and asked people to share advice about the campaign. I discuss this classic mistake in my article about tough-love feedback: Even if you are really, truly open to making changes in real-time based on the input you receive, asking for advice after a project is live comes across as an ingenuine marketing ploy. So either share your project without the veiled disguise, or pick a very specific question to ask–something you are concerned about and actually can change on the fly.
- One of the positives of making the people around you feel like their voices matter is that you get recommendations, not just feedback and criticism. I try to do this on my YouTube channel–I respond whenever someone suggests a new top 10 topic in the comments, as I really do appreciate their idea and will likely use it in the future. Todd Sattersten has a great blog post about recommendations here.
I would love to hear examples from you about things that leaders and creators have done to make your voice heard, and examples when you’ve done the same for other people.
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15 Comments on “Do You Believe Your Voice Matters?”
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Some common mistakes when asking for feedback:
– leaving it too late in the process. For example, if you’re putting together a timetable, sending round a draft timetable and asking for comments, you’re probably only going to make cosmetic changes, rather than throwing out the whole thing and starting again. Here in the UK, a lot of government consultations fall into this category, giving the general impression of “we’re required to consult, so we’ll go through the motions, but the decision’s already been made”
– not making it clear what sort of feedback you’re looking for. In playtesting, for example, early on, you probably want feedback on what seems fun, what mechanics seem interesting, and maybe a bit on balance, but aren’t interested in typos in the rules; late in the development process, you’re going to be more interested in typos in the rulebook, any points of confusion, anything that could improve the learning process, balance issues, and not so interested in being told what mechanics need more emphasis/exploration (though if there are still significant issues there, you really should act on them with some urgency)
– not following up on received feedback. Depending on the quantity of feedback and the channels it came through, it may not be practical to address every item directly, but spreading a “this is what we heard; this is what we did” message through the same channels as the original solicitation should be possible. When someone puts forward a thoughtful suggestion, or a heartfelt complaint, hearing nothing back, or only getting an impersonal form letter back immediately reduces the chance of them offering feedback in future.
– being dishonest in your response. On one occasion, I wrote to my then-local MP about something and got back a generic response along the lines of “Thank-you, $name$, for your message about $issue$. This is something I feel very strongly about.” Then the next week, there was an important vote on that issue, which my MP didn’t even turn up for…
One thing I’ve done is to repeat back what I heard, and ask if I accurately heard what was said. Sometimes we’ll have a few back-n-forths before I get the confirmation that I truly heard what was said. Not only does the person feel heard, but without my having a firm grasp of their ideas, I wouldn’t be able to implement, or even consider, those new perspectives.
One thing that rubs me the wrong way is after I respond to a request for feedback and the person extending the invitation defends why they were doing what they were doing.
I really like that tip of repeating back what you heard! I need to do that more often.
Having people feel their voice is heard is a huge deal. I work as an assistant principal and it is important my staff of teachers have a voice. One way I have done this is with master schedule generation. We sent out some surveys and collected wishes, dreams, and desires about what people needed. Designing a schedule is best with a small team, but everyone’s input is important. Once the team analyzed the feedback and made a final decision, we sat down with each teacher who was not on the team and brought the survey they completed. We showed them where in the schedule they could find things they asked for and explained the WHY behind the decisions that didn’t go their way. This created a great deal of trust for future projects of this kind. We had a small team so sitting down one by one was possible. With a larger survey group you could publish the aggregate data and make connections to the decisions.
A little off your main topic, but “Cause and Effect” is one of my favorite ‘Star Trek: TNG’ episodes. I’m also a big fan of time loop fiction. The episode “Monday” from ‘The X-Files’ (S6E14) is another good entry. And if you haven’t read “All You Need Is Kill” by Hiroshi Sakurazaka, I highly recommend it. It served as the basis for “Edge of Tomorrow” (also very good).
On topic, I’ve done a lot of playtesting for boardgames (much of it for Automa Factory) and it’s always rewarding to make a suggestion and have the design team respond by engaging me in conversation about my thoughts. They may implement some version of it into the playtest to see if it works, or they may explain why they don’t think it’s the right direction. But I appreciate knowing my feedback is heard. Morten and David are great at making their playtesters feel valued.
Thanks Matt! I appreciate the recommendations. I’ve read All You Need to Kill (and I love Edge of Tomorrow), but I haven’t seen that episode of the X-Files. Here’s my blog entry about favorite time-loop fiction: https://jameystegmaier.com/2019/03/whats-your-favorite-time-loop-fiction/
I’m glad you feel that way about playtesting for Stonemaier, as your voice is absolutely heard!
Thanks for the link! Some great choices there. Even a few new to me, so thanks for adding some more time loop options to my viewing/reading lists!
I believe that some leaders make the mistake of appointing co-workers who are just like themselves, because they identify with them and feel comfortable. But you don’t need someone who is just like yourself. You need someone with different skills and perspectives to yourself. There is an old saying that ‘If two people in an enterprise always think the same thing…you don’t need one of them.’ This is very true. You need people who bring something new and inevitably that means at times they will throw in a curveball or take you out of your comfort zone.
Gary: Well said! I completely agree. While I want to work with people with similar core principles (i.e., inclusivity, bringing joy to others, customer-focused approach, etc), I want them to have and express perspectives that are distinctly different than mine.
“I want that type of pushback, regardless of the outcome” – I believe this is the BIGGEST aspect of making decision based off feedback. If I make a suggestion that is contrary to boss person, and boss person decides to use my suggestion after some vigorous debate, the last thing I want is “I told you so” or “we should have done it my way” from boss person if it doesn’t go well. Corrective criticism about my method and how it could be improved? YES let’s do that. I’ve had to learn how to not take it personally when I am criticized, but I am still not a fan of being criticized without corrective suggestions.
Thanks! You’re right–I can see bosses doing that (and I’m guilty of that too). But it just seems counterproductive to have that attitude on an ongoing basis if you’re all working towards the same goal–in a healthy environment, “I told you so” isn’t something people will be thinking or saying.
I engaged with what Adam H. Highlighted most. “Do you think any changes will be made due to the responses on this survey.” A clear benchmark of trust in the process? I work for a wonderful non_profit organization at a hotel and conference center. We fill out these surveys 3 or 4 times a year…but, I don’t personally feel they value my feedback. The company is focues on number generated company wide results…its all fake news. One leader granted me a meeting to air some of my feedback. It also was artifice, no intention of action. I still haven’t sat done and played Pendulum yet. Much. Love.
Mitch: I wonder if there’s a way for an organization like yours to make a change to make you feel heard.
I make it very intentional that my feelings will not be hurt by negative feedback and that I want to hear it. And then follow through without defensiveness. The ego needs to stay out of the way of making the best possible product.
One thing I have learned working in politics, is your opponents are really great at diagnosing your blind/weak spots. Sometimes it will be overblown and politicized, but if you listen to dissent you will learn from it. Something the Democrats did not do from 2016 but I am spidering off. This is the principle of having an outside consultant come in to evaluate your work. They are more objective than you can be. As long as the complaints are put forth in good faith, they are worth considering.
As to my voice mattering. I guess it is a matter of weighing in, doing it w decency and for the right reason and hoping for the best. This is a very complicated question and man I hate to bring it up, but the geek I feel has not been listening.
On sensitive topics on the geek, even well thought out posts that do not agree with the OP 100% are being pulled as being “dismissive.” There does not seem to be a way to bring up alternative points of view.
One recent post, I do not want to link and draw more attention to it, has whole pages of 25 comments where the majority have been censored. This heavy hand bothers me. I have had my posts pulled, where I disagreed but did not do it in any hateful way. I am being threatened with suspension. There is no way to really appeal as it leads to more trouble. This is very frustrating.
You know me, I am decent, honest, and usually write from an authentic POV that tries to describe my experience in a respectful way. Yet no matter how respectful I feel I have been, because I have been dissenting, I have been pulled and warned.
It has a chilling effect. I do not feel as welcome on the site, and I am now afraid to speak up if I disagree as I do not want to get kicked off, it is unclear how many warnings you get. I have not been overly persistent either, overposting, just weighing in here and there. What is worse is it is being done in the name of inclusivity, but for the first time I feel my voice is not being heard there.
Thanks for sharing your perspective and that example, Candy. I agree–if I stumbled up a post with a significant number of removed/hidden/censored comments, there’s no way I would think my opinions would matter there.