24 May 2013 | 39 Comments
Wow, the semifinals for this tournament were intense! I closed the polls without looking at the results, and then I realized that “internet disconnected” beat “robot takeover” by a single vote! “Moon implosion” won by a wider margin in the other matchup.
That brings us to the finals. If you’re joining us for the first time, what we’re doing is determining the apocalypse that creates the dystopian world of Euphoria. The result of this final matchup will inspire the creation of four new recruits in every copy of the game, so you will directly have an impact on the game. Voting will continue through Monday.
Let’s look at the scenarios through your eyes:
Internet Disconnected: The day begins like any other day. You wake up, stumble over to the bathroom, and check your e-mail on your phone. There’s no signal. No wi-fi, no 3G, nothing. You grunt your disapproval–you were hoping to hear from that girl you’ve been e-mailing with. When you get to work, you find your coworkers walking aimlessly about the office. “What’s going on?” you ask. “Internet’s down,” they tell you. You shrug and get some coffee.
At your desk, you try to do work, but you realize that everything you do is linked to the internet. E-mail, cloud servers, Facebook…everything. You hear shouts coming from down the hall, and you run to see what’s happening. Everyone is huddled around the TV. As a reporter intones that they’re still gathering data, the underwater camera zooms in on the massive fiberoptic cables on the ocean floor that distributes internet around the world. You gasp. The cable, which is as wide as a Hummer, is split open. It is as if a giant claw hooked the cable and ripped it in two.
The camera zooms in on another cable. Then another. Then another. The internet isn’t just down–it. Is. Dead.
Moon Implosion: You scamper over the dune, your thin summer skirt sticking to your legs as you run. The sand beneath your feet is wet from the nearby ocean and chilled by the night air. You stumble, but your boyfriend catches you by the hand and pulls you toward him. It’s just you and him alone on the dune, not a soul in sight, the stars blinking overhead. This is the moment you’ve been waiting for.
Suddenly, the world grows still. Something has changed. You follow your boyfriend’s gaze into the sky. “What is that?” he asks. Up above you, the moon appears to be…shrinking. At first you think your eyes are deceiving you, so you hold your fingers up to the moon as if to pinch it. Sure enough, the moon continues to grow smaller and smaller.
Then it explodes.
It would be the most remarkable meteor storm in history if not for the fact that the the moon just exploded. The sky lights up with shards of moon, leaving behind blank space.
You boyfriend senses your fear, and he pulls you even closer. “It’s okay, babe,” he says. “It’s far away. It won’t affect us.”
You kiss him on the cheek. Pretty, but not so smart. He has forgotten about the tides.