Something happened recently in St. Louis–where Stonemaier Games is based–that really made me think, so I thought I’d share it with you. It’s an example of someone declaring independence, and in the spirit of July 4 beyond this example, it raises a question of what’s holding you back (creatively, professionally, personally, etc)? If you could–and you can–from what would you declare independence?
Last year I joined some friends for a meal at a fancy restaurant in St. Louis called Bulrush. The experience inspired a blog post, and it really left a mark on me in terms of quality, service, and mission. Chef Rob was at the heart of this, quite literally–he was there with his team throughout the meal to cook, serve, and answer questions. Bulrush made such a strong impression that we returned twice more over the year that followed, always sharing it with someone new.
Then, out of nowhere, Chef Rob posted this on his Instagram a little over a week ago (these are a few key paragraphs from his posts and comments on June 25 and July 2):
“It is with great sadness that I announce the closure of Bulrush restaurant. Bulrush has been my professional dream – allowing me to merge my passions for social advocacy, research, and of course, food. Over the past five plus years I have had the honor of working with some of the best hospitality professionals in the city, and we’ve been able to create a one-of-a-kind experience, playing our part in shining the national culinary spotlight on St Louis.
But why [close] now, when we are at a height of accomplishment? I have become uneasy promoting a state that is actively working to harm the LGBTQ community, especially the trans community. As an owner of a reparative restaurant working to make amends for the harms of the past, I can not continue supporting my own oppressor.”
This is a powerfully bold example of someone walking the walk, not just talking the talk. Chef Rob (perhaps just “Rob” now?) has actively advocated for the LGBTQ community in St. Louis and Missouri for years, and with the lack of change, he’s walking away. Bulrush will no longer generate tax dollars for Missouri or outside attention for a state that clashes so much with Rob’s principles.
My personal beliefs happen to align with Rob’s, but even if they didn’t, I have a lot of respect for any person or organization that puts their principles before profits. Rob said in the post that he has struggled with this choice for nearly a year, so this wasn’t an impulse decision. I imagine that he weighed the pros and cons with his staff–nearly a dozen people lost their jobs as a result of this decision–before declaring independence of Missouri.
What’s next for Rob? I don’t know, though I certainly wish him the best in his future endeavors. If he eventually opens another restaurant, where will it be? Is there anywhere that is fully and forever aligned with anyone’s principles? Cities change, states evolve, and most countries have different presidents every few years. How does any business owner reconcile the differences between their beliefs and their elected officials (as well as their coworkers)? And how does that scale when your business is global–Stonemaier Games serves customers and communities worldwide, spanning vast cultural differences?
Lots of food for thought! I’m curious to hear your opinions about independence, whether it’s due to principles or any other creative freedom you’re seeking.
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7 Comments on “From What Do You Declare Independence?”
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I worry that stepping away like that might do more harm to the causes he fights for. It removes a very-needed place of safety and support for the LGBTQ community that he created. And it might also diminish his ability to influence the future direction of the state on those issues. We need people like him to stay and fight for human rights.
Thanks for highlighting this tricky situation! It’s hard to know exactly how to make the biggest positive impact, but if you have the freedom to walk away from something you disagree with, I think it can often make a difference in ways that aren’t fully or immediately quantifiable. Chef Rob’s decision had an immediate, direct impact (fewer tax dollars and less fame for MO), but many ripple effects too (Jamey wrote about it on his board game blog, bringing greater attention to this topic that’s important to Chef Rob).
Jamey, I think a lot of the work you do falls into this category. You have direct control over Stonemaier games and can thus choose to spend extra money to produce a game in a more environmentally friendly way, but then by also writing about it and adding visibility to the topic, you inspire many other publishers to think about those issues too.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Ira. I like that you brought up the intangible impacts of publicly walking away from something (or towards something, in other cases).
I am afraid I do not understand Rob’s actions. I see that they closed the restaurant in complain for what Missouri has (or hasn’t) done to improve lives for the LGBTQ community…but where should one stop?
Say Missouri changes direction and becomes a beacon of acceptance for the minorities…but then the US as a country does not. Or what if the US becomes a beacon of acceptance but America as a continent goes backwards? Or Earth as a whole?
Of course Rob is free to do whatever they want, and the restaurant is theirs to do as they please. I just do not see the connection between what they want (a more accepting society) and what they did (closing a restaurant).
I’ve thought about this too since reading the announcement, and I’ve tried to empathize with Rob and put myself in his shoes (including reading his posts multiple times). Here’s one way to understand it on a more micro level: Say you own a small business that’s in a building owned by someone else. The owner of the building has very different beliefs than you, and they’re very vocal about those beliefs. Everyone knows about them. You run your business like a champ for a few years, and during that time you show up to the monthly meetings at the building with the other business owners in the hopes of either the owner evolving or that eventually you have enough support from other the other businesses that the building is sold to someone better. But it never happens, and you begin to feel like it’s never going to happen. Meanwhile, your business gets pretty famous. People go out of their way to visit your business and (as a result) the businesses around it. But every day you wish more and more that you weren’t a part of this building, as every day you become more tied to it by association and finances. Finally you realize that you have a choice: You can walk away. You know the building will still be there, but at least you’ll be free of it, and any spotlight or finances or anything role you played in highlighting the building will disappear into the night.
Would you walk away?
Even if I do not share Rob’s beliefs about the trans community, I applaud him for walking the walk.
In a completely different scale, I did something similar a few years ago when I decided that I could not continue supporting boardgamegeek due to their war on freedom of expression. Since then, I haven’t returned to the site, which is hurting me much more than them, but it is the only honest path I can take.
I hope Rob finds a place where he can restart his business and not feel bad for contributing to an entity misaligned with his convictions.
Thank you, Jamey, for bringing up this topic. It is indeed an important issue, whatever side of the aisle you are on.
I appreciate the way you contributed this comment despite the difference in beliefs/principles (the first few comments on Facebook struggled with this, prompting me to post a comment to say: “Just so it’s clear, the topic to discuss here is (as stated in the post): “I’m curious to hear your opinions about independence, whether it’s due to principles or any other creative freedom you’re seeking.” Off-topic, antagonistic, rude, or degrading comments will be removed, including your opinions about specific principles (e.g., this is not a platform for you to contend that some people should not have the same rights and protections as anyone else).”)